Reflections


John Holthe


"Happy belated birthday" goes to my brother Lawrence who turned "not 50 yet" last week.



Well, as the name implies, Thanksgiving is the holiday in which we give thanks to God for blessing us with family, friends, freedoms and financial fortitude...in addition to knowing a lot of words that begin with the letter "F". I'm thankful for all the blessings that God has given me...especially friends like Laurel Linder who e-mailed me the following jokes I thought you'd enjoy.

1. TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.

MARIA: Here it is.

TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?

CLASS: Maria.

2. TEACHER: Why are you late, Frank?

FRANK: Because of the sign.

TEACHER: What sign?

FRANK: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."

3. TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?

JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.

4. TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"

GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L

TEACHER: No, that's wrong.

GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

5. TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?

DONALD: H I J K L M N O.

TEACHER: What are you talking about?

DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.

6. TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.

INNIE: Me!

7. TEACHER: Goss, why do you always get so dirty?

GOSS: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

8. TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?

CLYDE : No, teacher. It's the same dog.

9. TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?

LOUIE: Because George still had the axe in his hand?

10. TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?

SIMON: No sir, I don't have to. My Mom is a good cook.

Well, that's it for this week. I hope you enjoyed this column. I know I didn't write any of the jokes, but I thought that you would enjoy them.

If you have any jokes you want to send me or if you have a topic that you think would make a good column, please e-mail me at jcholthe@swoidup.net.

Happy Thanksgiving!